3rd Jan

 Saal ka teesra din,,, phir subah 5 baje ka alarm baja par band kar ke soya to utha 9 baje hi... is par kaam karna ab jaruri sa lagta hai jaise pehle 5 baje uthta tha gym jaata tha exercise karta tha wo hi routine wapis lana hai... aaj jo accha hu wo ye ki apni limits ka pata chala... 4 books order ki  ek free ride, 2 sudha murty ki or ek travelogue.... aaj pata laga ki mai chahe to kya nahi kar sakta.... no biscuits, no sugar, read more than 120 pages, 9km ki walk...  mujhe ye pata laga ki agar main chahu to apne aap ko challenge kar sakta hu or kisi aadat ko chhodna mushkil nhi hai mere liye... aaj poora din no instagram jiska addiction ho gya tha.... bas thoda lonely feel hota hai ki mera bhi koi partner hona chahiye...  nayi job honi chahiye... ab wo kab hoga wo to sirf bhagwan jaanta hai... vishwaas hai ki yaha tak lekar aaya to aage bhi le hi jaayega... 

2nd Jan 2026

 Saal ka dusra din start hua late uthne se... socha tha uthunga 5 baje or utha 8.45am par aur phir wo hi uthte hi phone dekhna... ye samajh aata hai ki ye aadat gandi hai aur change karni hai par chhot nahi rahi.. phir subah subah nisha ka call aaya thodi derbaatein kari or phir apna routine... ye FMS ke dost socha nahi tha is age mei koi dost bhi banenge par pyaare hai aur achhe hai... Bhagwan ki pooja ki aur aaj khaane ko mila mera favourite palak paneer... thodi der office ka kaam kiya phir wo hi gandi aadat instagram scroll karne ki.... aisa laga ki addiction ho gya saara din instagram to finally aaj instagram app delete kar diya phone mein se ab wo kitne din rehta hai wo dekhna hai... Phir nisha vikram ke sath video call karte karte kab 8.5km walk kar li pata hi nahi chala... aisa laga ki kaise shiva meri zindagi mei aaye aur kaise kaise unhone anubhav karaye aur aage bhi wo hi sambhalenge... aaj kuch productive to nahi kiya bas ek motorcycling ki video dekhi ki kaise motorcycling heal karti hai... cortisol ghat ta hai... UCLA ki study kehti hai ki motorcycling se focus badhta hai, pre frontal cortex mei change hota hai... bas ab nisha aur vikram ke sath phir call.... aisa lagta hai jaise shiva ne inse milwaya hi isiliye ki stress kam ho jaye... bas ab din ka ant karenge... kitab ke kuch panne padheneg... aur aaj ek nayi book bhi order ki... free ride... koshish to hai ki ye likhna jaari rahe or shayad kal gym chala jau... Aaj udaasi wali feeling to nahi aayi par lonely jarur feel hua...

1st Jan 2026

Journal 1_1st Jan 2026

Aaj naye saal ka pehla din, aankh khuli to FMS ke dosto Nisha aur Vikram ki video call se, jisme planning hui ki Saumya ki new year gathering mei kab tak pahuchna hai... Saal ka pehla din tha to socha apna CV hi bana lo badi mashakkat ke baad CV bana is umeed ke sath ki is saal to dusri naukkri mil hi  jayegi.. ab milegi ya nahi ye to bhagwan hi jane par ummed ke sath start kiya pir whirlpool mei bheja aur Google mei Sr. PM youtube ke role ke liye apply kiya... Aaj pehla din tha to bhagwan ka aashirwaad to lena jaruri tha to pookja ki... aaj tau ji ko gaye hue 20 saal ho gye to bhai ne jo bhandara kiya wo baata aur usi mei 3 kab baj gaye pata hi nahi chala.... socha ki aaj se wapis walk kar k dekhte hai to kart karte 8 km ki wal karli, dosto se baatein bhi kar li, new year wish bhi kar liya... mujhe lagne laga tha ki main bhi instagram addict hta ja rhahu... saara din phone par hi time nikalta hai to ussi time walk karte hue youtube khola to aaya how to remove the addiction of soacial media to us par Netflix ki documentary The social dilemma dekh daali... bas ye documentry dekhna hi ek productive kaam hua... aur koshish ki khana khaate hue phone na dekhu or usme kamiyaab bhi rha... phir ek dost se video call hui jisme uski gaadi ka puncture video call par hi lagwa liya... to saal ka pehla din aisa hi kata... ab ye journal likhna jo start kiya hai umeed hai ye kayam rahega... ab bas sone ki taiyaari... kal milenge..